Phantasy Star Skits!
by NotUsedAnymorelolololololo
Summary: Skits and bloopers based on Phantasy Star 1 to 4! Yay! Read, Laugh, Review.
1. Act 1: The Manhole

Phantasy Star Skits. By Partially Crazy. 

Act 1: The Manhole.

Note: This ficcy assumes Noah is male.  
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Alis and company were quite estatic about their new party member, Noah. Now, they had to find Dr. Luveno in Gothic, however, they had to find a manhole first. They finally found the manhole, but nobody knew how to open it.

"Noah, do you know how to open it?" Alis questioned, to unintelligent to comprehend this for herself. (Whadayya expect? She's a warrior! Not a scientist!)

"Dur, No-ha. How da ya opun the manhole now? CHONKA CHONKA CHONKA!" added Odin, also being a not-scientist, and therefore didn't know how to open a manhole.

"Uh, sure." said Noah, and he lifted the manhole with his arms, and put the cover on the road. "C'mon, guys! Let's go to Gothic!"

Alis, Odin and Myau just stared at the manhole, mouths agape, not knowing what to say.

"What?"

It took a while before Alis burst in with, "Wow. You are so smart."

Myau also said, "How did you open it?"

Noah, believing that the team would be incompetent without him, replied, "Uh… I just opened the manhole."

Odin finshed with, "Wow."

Noah, now believing that he should just let the team solve their own problems, decided to leave. "Uh… I'm… gonna… leave now. Bye."

Noah ran off in a hurry, and the rest of the team just stayed there, staring at the manhole, trying to figure out how Noah opened it.

Odin then said, "What da ya think's inside?"

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Now this, I think is funny. Just incase you're not quite sure, I'm drawing this info from a Phantasy Star walkthrough. I haven't played the game to that part, but if there's monsters, just pretend they died.  
OK, there's more skits coming soon! Stay tuned!


	2. Act 2: Earth this, Earth that

Phantasy Star Skits. By Partially Crazy. 

Act 2: Earth this, Earth that.

Note: This assumes that PS3 took place around PS4. If memory serves, this should take place around 2332 AW, assuming that it's about 47 years after PS4.  
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Prince Aron and his comrades had defeated Dark Force. The ultimate evil. The main baddie. The head honcho. The incredibly evil god. The Fearless Leader. The… OK, I'll stop.

Aron hated the city Dark Force was fought in, and decided to destroy it for little to no reason, all the time yelling, "GRAAH! THE CITY IS TOO EVIL TO LEAVE STANDING! MEGIDO! MEGIDO! MEGIDO!"

"Calm down, Aron." Said a very cool and collected Mieu. "Just let me use Grantz and we're on our way. We d on't need to destroy a city more while it's already collapsing."

Mieu then used Grantz, and they flew up into their spaceship… or at least a different part of it. The city screamed as it went down into the lake. I don't entirely understand how land and rocks and pillars can screech angrily, but hey, not my problem.

The spaceship floated around for what seemed like a few eons before entering a time rift and going through the Sol system.

A few eons in the Alisa III's timeframe was the equivalent of 2 bicentennials.

2 bicentennials in the Alisa III's timeframe was the equivalent of a century.

A century in the Alisa III's timeframe was the equivalent of 13 days.

13 days in the Alisa III's timeframe was the equivalent of 5 minutes. So that means Aron and co. are still alive.

The Alisa III got a message sent to it. The London Space Company, the British equivalent of NASA, sent the message. "Dear inhabitants! Would you mayhaps like to stop by for a nice spot of tea? And maybe buy some of these knickers?"

At the London Space Company, a historian was looking through the various books written on space culture, until he stumbled on "The History Of The Mother Brain." Unfortunately, is was just a science fiction novel based on Metroid, so he threw it out. He then found a book that was titled, "The Evil Earthmen." Unfortunately, it was a controversial book about North America, so he threw that one out, too. Finally, he found a book titled, "When Humans and Cats Collide," but it was also irrelevant, so he gave up.

Then, he realized he had bought a game for his children, and they showed him the end of the game, in which the Earth people said their planet was destroyed. He went up to the director of the space program, and asked him,

"Sir, has this planet been destroyed yet?"

The director responded with, "Oh. Right." He pushed a button, and the entire planet exploded 1445 years before. Therefore, it disappeared, and Aron and co. were stuck.

"Well, crud."

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This is the second skit in the series. I hope you enjoyed reading them as much as I enjoyed making up lines on the spot for everyone to say!

There's more to come, so stay tuned!


	3. Act 3: Rolf's Loopy Recuits

Phantasy Star Skits. By Partially Crazy. 

Act 3: Rolf's Loopy Recruits.  
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"There's a knock on the door!"

"How do you do, Rolf. I am Hugh Thompson, a Biologist. I came when I heard about your quest. I value all life, including Biomonsters. I am willing to fight to defend weaker life forms, though. Perhaps my knowledge will be of help to you. I will feel like we are good friends if you give me a nickname."

"Good friends? Well, we can't, since there are 2 things. 1, I don't know you, and 2, I don't swing that way, pal. For that, I'm calling you NOTS (not straight.)"

"Your name suits you well"

* * *

"There's a knock on the door!"

"I have long wanted to meet you. I am Anna Zirski. I am known as a guardian. Although most hunters are good, some have gone bad; I track them down. My job is to hunt evil hunters, but I can hunt anything! I dislike guns, but give me a weapon with a blade, and I am deadly! I can help you. Yes, give me a new name and I can forget the past and concentrate on the present..."

"Wow. You're a stone cold fox, Anna! In fact, I don't even care about what you just said. I'm gonna call you FOXY."

"Your name fits you well"

* * *

"There's a knock on the door!"

"Howja do? I'se glad ta see ya. Yup, I done heard you goin' out after them bad'uns; I kin help ya. I ain't much fer them slimy critters, but...if any machines or robots git in yer way, I kin bust 'em up real good! My birthin' name be Josh Kain. Watsamatta? Don'cha think tha's a good name?"

"… Were you… talking… words…?"

"Watsamatta? Watsamatta? Watsamatta?"

"Oh my god! You're not even human!… Wait! You can be called 'EVIL.' Yeah. That sorta fits in with the non-human theme."

"Your name fits you well"

* * *

"There's a knock on the door!"

"Hello, Rolf. You are just as handsome as they say. I am Shir Gold. I am a thief. I care little for peace and justice. I steal for fun; and frankly, I think your little outing will be packed with thrills for me. I think I'd like to go with you. Remember, I'm Shir of the wind! Nothing can catch me! Do you want me to come with you? What, you want to give me a new name?"

"Wait. You don't want to save the world? GET OUT!"

"Meh. You're mean"

* * *

"There's a knock on the door!"

"How do you do? I am…"

"NEVERMIND! You know what, I'm just gonna save the world myself! I'll just stay away from Arima now. I'm tired of dealing with all of you crazy people, and I just want to be left ALONE!" SLAM!

There was dead silence before Nei piped up with,

"Gee, what's his problem?"

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OK, finished Skit #3! Hope you all are enjoying these! Please, read and review. If you have any ideas of what to put in for the next set of skits, there's a button that says 'Submit a Review' nearby. I'll see it, and it can be in the next short! Yay!


	4. Act 4: The Advantages of being

Phantasy Star Skits. By Partially Crazy. 

Act 4: The Advantages of being short. Or Tall. Whatever.

This skit is dedicated to the reviewer I shall affectionately refer to as'Reesiewoman.  
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* * *

Chaz, Rune, and the rest had stopped at Zelan, the weird sattellite flying somewhere in the 'Algo Planet'. At the central area, the group meets FoWren. A Wren-type rowbet. For continuity's sake, we're just gonna call him Wren. Is that cool with you? Okay then.

Chaz, completely astonished at Wren's height, a mere 7'9", exclaimed, "Wow, you're Wren! Gee, you're HUGE!"

Rune, seeing Wren as not quite as big, seeing as he, of course, was a bit taller, added, "Well, anything's huge to you, shorty."

"YOU BETTER TAKE THAT BACK!"

"I'm simply stating the facts, shorty."

"WELL THE FACTS ARE WRONG, YOU ARROGANT WIZARD!"

"Hmm. I guess you can't handle the truth, can ya?"

"Be quiet, guys!" Rika finally interrupted. "Anyway, Wren, I know you. We used to talk together via a computer!"

"Yes. Affirmative." Wren stated, in his freakishly androidesque vocal unit.

Rika had to introduce her friends to Wren. Then, he wouldn't try to destroy them. (Androids are VERY protective, you know.) "Wren, my friends here are Chaz and Rune. They're great pals!"

However, directly after Rika's statement, the boys completely wiped it off, as they argued more about Chaz's height and Rune's insults.

"GAAH! I'LL KILL YOU IF YOU DON'T STOP!"

"Ah, Alys only did teach you to fight. Worthless."

"HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT ABOUT AN OLD FRIEND OF YOURS!"

"She's not really a friend, but an aquaitance. I thought I made that clear."

"WELL, I'LL TSU YOU TIL YA CAN'T FEEL FEELINGS ANYMORE!"

"No matter. I can just cast Wat to make it gone in midair."

"WHY YOU SICK SON OF A…"

"Stop it Chaz! We're in a K+ rated fiction, you know. Or maybe you don't… "  
(winks)

"URRRGH! ARGH!"

Wren just had to correct Rika on her statement. "Uh huh. You said that those two are great pals, right?

* * *

Finally, another skit! I would like to thank Reesiewoman on her inspiration for the next skit. 

Well, now that I've covered at least one per original Phantasy Star game, that completes season one! Season two will start as soon as I find another thing to write about in the PS series. Thank you for readings:3


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